Recipe For Chaos

Real Stories From The Chaotic Front

My Greatest Birthday Present? Friends!

cupcakeMy family didn’t really do much for birthdays when I was growing up. They were acknowledged and all but it was very low key. A few gifts at the dinner table, people would sing, and my sister would usually bake a cake. (Except for Sweet 16! My parents and the parents of my best friend rented out the Tinley Park Roller Rink for a shared private party!) To this day I don’t really know how to respond properly when people wish me happy birthday. I generally just forget about the day altogether. I get a card in the mail from my mom and sister.  My brothers… ha! no way would they remember…but I know they love me! I tell the babies all I want is one day with no fighting… (yeah right) whatever…

Well, this year, my perfect friend Pam (OMG she REALLY IS perfect!) invited me and the boys over to her house to hang out and swim for a few hours before I went to work the later shift at the library. I came ready to hang out by the pool, hair in a pony, tee-shirt..you get the picture. We get there and she’s made a million cupcakes with sprinkles, has gifts on the table, (one from our friend Lori  too) tells me her daughter is babysitting (THANKS JACKIE!) and that she is taking me to lunch at TGI Fridays. OK….cool. We get there and are looking at the menu when another friend pops up! (eyebrow raised) Turns out, she called around and asked whoever was free to drop everything and come to lunch. WHO does that? This is only ONE of the reasons she’s perfect trust me. She asked when was the last time I went out for my birthday and guess what? It was when SHE took me to a Jimmy Buffet concert. This was not a big number birthday, it was just a regular old one.. But, it was amazing. I may not have much but I have wonderful friends! There were many wishes on FB and another friend took me to dinner that weekend while my son volunteered to babysit. I am truly blessed..and shamed. I feel good when I just remember to SAY Happy Birthday to someone. I have to do nice things for people on their birthdays now…It feels great! Who’s Birthday is next?

June 24, 2009 Posted by | Friends, Partys | 2 Comments

Movies Anyone?

park, movie, robertMy kids haven’t been to too many movies at the actual theater. I’ve tried taking them before. Generally with my kids it has to be one child per adult. If you knew them you wouldn’t be questioning that statement..You would be thinking ONLY one adult per child???? Last time I took them we had to barricade both ends of the aisle with an adult and sit near the back so Hayden who can’t sit still would be able to run to the bathroom every 11 minutes and fewer people would notice that Caleb will inevitability spill whatever snack he’s chosen before bursting into tears.  Ian…well, Ian would be more concerned with the other patrons than the movie and the back of the theatre provides the least distraction.

Well, I really wanted to try it again. They had been talking about the movie trailer for Night At The Museum Battle Of  The Smithsonian since it came out. I thought, they’ve grown a bit, it should be fine. I lined up my helpers. Grandma, Gavin and Veronica and I even offered to bring  a few of Gavin’s friends. Well, Grandma got a better offer and off she went to visit her sister in law (my favorite aunt so I can’t complain). Gavin and his GF ditched me at the last possible moment. Literally, shoes were on, keys in hand.  So, I pulled on my big girl pants and said…FINE! I’ll take them by myself! (Yes, I was worried but if they know you’re afraid they’ve got you!) We went early to the mall and with a little time on our hands attempted to look in a candy store (OMG NOT) then took two rides on the carousel and put a few quarters in the little kids video rides for Ian.

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I shouldn’t have worried (AS MUCH) Hayden only wanted to leave twice, once with Ian in tow but for the most part it was a blast. I watched them as much as I did the movie. It was adorable. We each got our own individual snacks and the kids took turn dipping Hayden’s Twizzlers and Ian’s popcorn into Caleb’s nacho cheese sauce.

I’d do it again…hopefully not alone…but glad I know I can do it!

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June 6, 2009 Posted by | Day Trips, General Mayhem | 4 Comments

Valentine’s heartache

broken-heartI told you all about making the valentines with the boys but I didn’t mention what was going on in the background..Hayden was complaining about probably being too sick to go to school. I should have seen the warning signs but they had been sick the week before so I just said “you’ll be fine, you can’t miss a party day.”  Friday morning Hayden kept saying he was headachy and feverish…neither of which were true. I pressed the issue until he finally confessed he didn’t want to go because none of the other kids said they were going to  give him a valentine. He said no one likes him and he would be embarrassed.  My heart broke for him. I know that he gets pulled out of classes because he goes to his “special” classes. It’s only recently that he’s discovered that his “specialness” does not mean that he is extraordinary. He’s in third grade and he is starting to feel the differences, I know that kids have pointed out this to him on at least a few occasions. He doesn’t make friends easily. He’s never been invited to a birthday party or to play at a friends house. I can tell you that there were tears in my eyes when I told him to go to school and that everything would be fine..just wait and see. I dropped them off and went to work.  I called the school as soon as I walked in. I knew the teacher would be with students so I talked to our schools amazing secretary who assured me she would go straight away and explain the situation to his teacher and call me right back.  Hayden’s teacher is wonderful too. She has been working hard with him to develop friendships in the classroom and keeps me apprised of his progress. She has a very big heart. I’m truly blessed that Hayden has her with him.  She said she downplays the whole card thing and tries to get the party started right away. Yea! When I got home that evening he said he got “stuff” and that his day was “fine”…for a boy that is fairly high praise.

Being a mother is hard work, we feel their pain the same way they do. It’s hard not to be able to carry their burdens for them. I know that his LD is minor and am blessed because I see those who have a much harder load to carry. I am also blessed by his being in my life. One day he will make true and lasting friendships with people who see what an incredible kid he is. Until then or, lets face it always, I will carry his heart in my hands.

February 15, 2009 Posted by | Partys | 5 Comments